Wow! There are a lot of blogs out there! I had no idea so many women are blogging...and that so many of them had my same idea years before I did...or are much cooler than I.
There's the woman who looks fabulously retro with her updo and red lips. There's the woman who writes so beautifully, each post is like a short sweet story. The women who make wonderful decor out of mason jars and burlap and old furniture. The chefs, the seamstresses, the quilters, the naturopaths. Everyone is good at something and I want to be good at it too...covet much? Do I look green with envy to you?
I should buy a professional camera and take pictures of seemingly boring things but in artistic and stylish ways so they seem really interesting. I need to blog about the fantastic cake I baked and not about the rest of the day spent on the couch half dressed, eating multiple bags of chips. Compile a list of maternity must-haves and fashion advice and favorite vacation spots. And then have a massive panic attack trying to make my life appear completely foreign to what it is in reality.
"Write about what you love." Which is great advice. So I wrote out my goals for the blog, the different topics I want to blog about and my heart or vision behind it all...a gameplan to help me get started. But then I found blogs that cover ALL of my goals much better or prettier than I ever could. It's as if I tried to patent a handheld device that allows you to talk to someone on the other side of the world and people are like "...uh, we already have cellphones."
I'm scared you guys. Scared of rejection, scared of insignificance, scared of looking silly or pathetic, scared of bad or boring writing. Maybe this is a good time to explore some self esteem issues (anyone familiar with Kat Williams standup? Not appropriate AT ALL so don't say I sent you, but whenever I say self esteem he pops into my head "I hurt YOUR self esteem? It's the esteem of YO' SELF" ps, I may enjoy Kat's inappropriate standup way too much...since we're in the middle of confession time) or fear of man issues that I SO obviously possess.
How's that for honesty? We've touched on my insecurities as well as my inappropriate choices in tv and unhealthy addiction to potato chips. Not exactly the best way to start off a new chapter in blogging history (assuming my blog would even make it into history). So this is your official warning...it's not going to be pretty. I wish it was. I wish my life was more "together" or nicer or translated into pretty photographs...but it's not. Fact is, I'm an extremely messy person...emotionally, relationally, and literally (my husband can attest). There are plenty of pretty blogs out there...even a lot of pretty AND messy blogs. I have a feeling mine will mostly be messy...but I shall rejoice the few times it is pretty.
Welcome to my mess. Want to sit in it a while with me?
PS. New blog design is still coming soon. Really excited to unveil, it will be the coolest thing about this blog...only because I didn't design it. I'm learning my strengths, design is not one of them.
PPS. "Strength and dignity are her clothing, she laughs at the times to come" is the verse that inspired the design and direction of this blog...obviously not because I am particularly strong, dignified, or confident but because this is the woman I aspire to become. Laugh with me or at me as I share this journey with you.
PPPS. What does "PS" stand for?
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